The next 5 big things I want to do with my life.

So, I have started writing this post probably a dozen times and either just shut the computer off or deleted it right before publishing. I guess I have been in a funk lately. A lazy, self indulgent - happy to be depressed - sort of funk. It has sort of been a vacation from all the stress that was moving to New York. First there was the uncertainty if it was ever going to happen and then there was my own doubt that I wouldn't be able to pull it off. Once I arrived I was terrified that everybody would figure out how much of it I was just winging and how I was pretending to know what I was doing.

My first few weeks of work summed up in a cake

Finally, at last, I can take a breath. The realization that I am here and not going anywhere for a while and have settled in and now just have to worry about day to day things has been long overdue. Now I am celebrating with some anti-climactic couch potato-ing, just for a bit.

The five big things I want to do with my life next:

1. Start a secret society.

I have been obsessing over this for almost two years now. It all started when I read a book called Gold, Diamonds and War describing the early years of colonial Souith Africa and how a handful of men dominated almost every political and economic decision for decades. I then started noticing how in almost all spheres of life there are a handful of individuals running the show. There is the famous 80-20 rule which states that 80% of outputs is always generated by 20% of the input. 80% of revenue comes from 20% of your clients etc. I was then wondering how I get to be one of those handful of men? Do I have to work extremely hard and hope to get noticed and get invited? Will I have to masturbate in a coffin or eat a live pigeon to prove my loyalty? What happens if I just start my own one?

What if as a group we could use all that hard work for something a little extra. Use each other in a symbiotic way to increase our chances of achieving what we deem as successful. I know people that will end up being some pretty powerful people. I also know we can fast track the whole process if we worked together from the beginning in a concerted effort. So why the hell not? I ask that question a lot?

Then there is this quote that has always struck a chord with me.

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."   --  Margaret Mead

A secret society for me is a way of insuring social and career growth through the mutual benefit of like minded individuals striving to help eachother acheive their life goals. So you know who you are and you can be expecting a formal inviation soon. I'm thinking of calling it. We are Ladies. We are Gentleman.


2. Taking a significant amount of time to do something truly adventurous. Like driving from Cairo to Capetown. Or riding the silk route on a scooter.

or winning all five gym badges.

Now put up a crazy tree and this idea would be the cardboard angel sitting proudly on the top. Now I know you are thinking, oh Justin, you and your ideas! This is silly! That's so cute! Fuck you. I am being serious and after discussing it with some very close friends of mine and initial research the only thing standing in our way is sponsorship and cajones. By cajones I mean balls and by that I mean bravery. Individually if we are able to put together the details that are involved, we will prove not only how far we have come as adults in our mad dash out of the collegial gates but the incessant fear that I will somehow lose out on my wonder years sits with me daily and I will not let any opportunities go to waste.

3. Attempt to host a travel TV show

Now this goes hand in hand with the previous idea and the fact that the group of people I have been discussing this with, all happen to have the exact qualifications that would make a small production team not only possible but the only relevant thing we could all do with our subsequent skill sets. Throw in the fact that between us, we all have an innate ability to entertain and an arrogant predisposition of sharing all of our thoughts with the world, we are perfect candidates. History favours the bold and I want to be the boldest.

4. Start an Events management company.

Before I left South Africa, two of my best friends and I had a small and successful events management company that had grown out of us being hired as private chefs and then being really good at it. We had lined up two weddings and our first corporate when I got the go ahead to come to the states and we decided to put the idea on hold till I got back. I am saving as much money as possible so that as soon as I get back we can dust off the old recipe books and start all over again. The best part about the whole thing is that it does not have to be my day job and we can still work during the days. The whole time we were working on the past functions we were at college full time. Hopefully if it grows important enough we can start focussing on it full time.

5. Work with my friends.

Up until this point in my life I have done my fair share of hard work. Now I have never worked for years but I have worked extremely long hours doing extremely mundane things and think I have a firm grasp of exactly what the working world looks like. With the small events company we had last year I learnt two extremely valuable lessons. Working for yourself is awesome, working with your friends is just as awesome. Now there are doubts over money and friends and I can understand why it doesn't work out. However after a 15 hour day and you can finally sit back and have a sip of beer and your best friend is in exactly the same head space as you is a truly magical feeling. Every second that feels like a lifetime is worth it because you are doing it for each other and yourself.

Yes, I wanna heavily invest my future success in you people.

The 5 harsh realities of living by yourself

I thought it was time I posted something based in reality and share some truth. This week was my first week as a fully fledged employee and it got me thinking what the hell fledged means and how you can only be half fledged. So I looked it up.

fledged

   [flejd]  Show IPA

adjective

1.

having the plumage or feathers necessary for flight.

2.

having the characteristics of maturity.

Generally I am an all rainbows kind of guy. Perpetual optimism is my thing but I have taken a few knocks this week and this post is my attempt to shake them off.

The 5 Harsh Truths of Living in NYC

5. The Loneliness.

The Truth: 
Moving to New York City by myself will always be one of the greatest accomplishments of my life. I think I have proved to myself that I have the stamina to face the world and invite it to a tea party and have scones with it. Somewhere loneliness is supposed to equate to sadness but that isn't how I have experienced it at all. For me, loneliness, is frustrating. It grows in me like a shallow rage that the things I'm seeing and the experiences I am having aren't being shared with anybody. My memories are solo ones and not having another person who can relay the stories makes them seem half as valuable.

Life loves scones.

The Twist:
Being on your own magnifies learning situations. There is no distraction from the fact that you just witnessed or learnt something spectacular. If sharing experiences adds more text to your book of life, being alone adds more books. It is great that I am growng this pool of knowledge that is wholly my own to draw from. It adds depth and magnitude and gives you confidence in your own decisions. It also frees you from explaining your decisions all of the time. It is a fantastic feeling to know that I have control over all of my time for a while.

4. The Competitiveness.

The Truth:
When the agency that helped me secure my visa also included a booklet on how to prepare for the competitiveness of the American job market I took it with a pinch of salt. I mean it is competitive everywhere and everybody is trying to get ahead. The big difference is the levels I have seen it be taken too and the general acceptance that if you ruin somebody in the process they had it coming. There doesn't seem to be a bigger picture in this company like there is in others I have worked in. I help people out whenever I can and I am thankful for the people that have helped me along the way. When it comes down to your reputation and your career you have to concentrate on yourself .

The Twist:
If you know me well enough you know exactly what is coming next. BRING IT ON MOFO. I haven't been writing about being able to pick yourself up because I am optimistic and don't know how hard it is. I do know how hard it is but it is the only option if you want to be successful. It teaches you to persevere and push and smile while you doing it. If it is a dog eat dog world I am a chihuahua that has learnt to use a knife and fork and I will smother you in delicious gravy. MMMMMMM gravy.

The gravy will be hot and it will burn you.

3. The Fear of Deportation.


I am on a J1 exchange visa and cannot work for any other company than the one I am working with now. Therefore if I don't work for this company I don't have a visa and will get my well formed behind catapulted back home. It is pretty terrifying to think that the only thing keeping me from being packed in a box of shame and embarrassment and shipped home is my ability to not screw up. I really have no idea how I would handle having to return home before my year is up because I made a mistake that got me fired. The idea of letting myself down like makes me wince.

This is what my farewell party will look like. 

The Twist. 
I have a very real and present motivation that few others have. While my colleagues are working to improve their lives and try get a promotion I am working to stay in the frikken country. Every time I get crabby or want to go home I get a snort of stop being retarded powder and count the blessing that I made it this far and will make it so much further. I think my smile and preppy attitude are beginning to piss some of my colleagues off but they don't realize that I do actually want to be at work everyday.

2. Budgeting.


The Truth.
I used to control my finances the same way a baby flies a plane - badly. I would get paid and then have a race with myself to see how fast and stupidly I could spend it and I would usually win. I was such a winner. I have no regrets as my lack of foresight allowed me to enjoy the last couple of years in a whimsical fun search where the only commitment was my daily dose of "Hell yea" . But that hedonistic ship has sailed and it is time to ride on the more responsible tugboat of early adulthood and it sucks. Instead of beautiful nights wining and dining at fantastic restaurants I now spend money on toilet paper and shampoo and it makes me cry inside.

The Twist.
I was having a discussion with a friend on when he first felt like an adult and he said it was the first time he withdrew cash from an ATM and felt poorer instead of richer. Ain't that the truth. It boils down to simple responsibility and being an adult is sacrificing the things you want to do for the things you need to do, isn't it? Well whatever it is, I am being forced to learn it and will only be better off in the long run.

1. Knowing that life goes on without you.

The Truth. 
It is amazing how in contact a person can be nowadays. Through facebook, Skype, my mobile phone I speak to people back home on a daily basis. It is really awesome and I can only imagine how hard it must have been for the kids who did this same transition back in the dark ages of the 1980's and yonder. The one thing about moving that does make me sad is that I am no longer apart of so many peoples lives. When I hear about the things that have happened I can't help but feel like I missed out on something. I love being apart of other peoples stories when they relay them at dinner parties and at the moment I am not in very many.

The Twist.
You only want the things you can't have and it would be very short sighted of me to deny myself the beauty of the whole experience by focusing on what I am missing. After all it is only for a year and then I will be back home pining to return to New York City where the lights will inspire me and the streets will make me feel brand new. I stole that last line fro Alicia Keys and Jay Z, so if you are reading this then sorry . Overall I am learning what it means to be a self sufficient adult. I am incredibly happy and am loving every second of it. Sometimes I get homesick but then I remember how many of my friends would kick me in the shin for this opportunity and that makes me smile. 

Just woke up and saw this on my friends feed.

I will remember this next time a guest is giving me hell. 

The scarf method of sustaining relationships.

Damn it, I feel like Oprah right now!

Back in the good old days of two months ago I had a life coach who was guiding me through the massive changes I was making to my life at that point. The very last lesson she taught me was a method of sustaining professional relationships known simply as SCARF. This may come across as a new age self help diatribe but the intention is pure, I promise you. I think that any new method can only add to your skill set, take what you need from it, and leave the rest to the hippies.

The  SCARF approach is a form of relationship review that enables you to see the ways you may or may not be contributing to a relationships success. If the classic "it is who you know, not what you know" still applies then it is well worth it looking into.

SCARF is an acronym - surprise, you did not see that coming, did you? You thought it was a magical fashion accessory passed down through a long line of proud middle management families. It is not and I apologize because there are magical pieces of clothing that give you superpowers but this post is not about them.

These are not magic either, they made to look like boobs.

Before we delve into the life altering effects of the hidden meanings of 5 alphabetic letters that conveniently make a word, we have to understand a standard principle of human psychology and it concerns motivation. The brain has two settings when it comes to action - either you are motivated or you are not. Motivating people means they respect your authority, they like being around you and they will always take a little extra time when helping you out. Demotivating people is the opposite in meaning but not in action. When you demotivate somebody their response to your requests will be pure apathy. To explain this further a demotivated person won't be excited that you have just set your hair alight but they won't be running to find a fire extinguisher either.

Going further I will use real life examples displayed by the worst manager I have come across in my short existence. Bear in mind that I have had a multitude of jobs in different positions and have worked for every stereotype imaginable. The director of the college I studied at was a proud and tyrannical beast with a penchant for Scottish wit and a completely unrealistic view of people. He made my life excruciatingly difficult and I have absolutely no regard for his advice or authority. I would not hold so little regard for him if he hadn't thrown the two people I started a successful catering company with out of his school for apparently personal and archaic reasons. This analogy will be known as the Martin principle.

S - Status 

Status refers to a persons self worth or their perception of the size of the contribution they are able to make and is easily confused with ego or social power. It boils down to self worth and confidence. If you can make a person feel more confident in their abilities you can increase their status. If you disagree with everything they say because they are Mormon and don't trust them, you are decreasing their status. If you take five minutes to personally acknowldege the contributions they have made you will increase their status. This is not about complimenting people for the sake of making them happy but recognizing worth when it right in front of you.

Martin Principle: Every idea or method of approaching a problem was met with complete disdain.. I was head of a group planning the very first Golf Day for the college and thought it would be easier if I made the budget available online so that it was always in easy reach of my group members. I got a foreboding warning that I have "re-invented" budgeting and that he misses when students used good ol' pen and paper. I started emailing him instead of having direct contact from that point on. Another example is a proposal I had written for a Movember fund raiser which is an international organisation that creates awareness for testicular cancer. I handed him a fully typed proposal complete with financials and he simply took the packet and threw it down at my feet. He did not even bother listening to any explanation but was appalled that I would approach him with such nonsense.

C- Certainty.

Easy as pie, certainty refers to whether or not you have actually conveyed exactly what you are expecting and how you would like it to be done. Managers so often forget that although they are all powerful their underlings do not have the same access to information and training as them. Demotivation occurs when the only instruction an employee receives is " do a good job and don't get fired." This leaves a massive hole of understanding that impedes any action. "What do you consider a good job, how do I accomplish that, what will get me fired?" are all questions you as a manager just left unanswered.

Martin Principle: I had indicated on my second day of college that in order to pay back my student loans I would have to work an extra few days every couple of months. My request was honest and was a last resort compromise between the college and my employers. I was offered many options by my employers and they actively worked around my schedule. I was told by the Martin that I would be able to take those days. A few months later I was in a complete bind and approached the school concerning the arrangement that had already been agreed upon. I happily worked five days driving a camper van down the coast for a couple completing a mountain bike race. Two days later I had an official warning against my name and my parents had been called because of my untrustworthiness,. I actually cried in front of the Martins wife at the unfairness of it all and was still labelled a delinquent.

A- Autonomy

The next as a manager comes down to the space you are willing to let your employees work in. There are probably very specific ways of getting the job done in time but then their are also plenty of ways that you as a manager have not thought of yet. It is easy to demotivate somebody by combining the demotivation of uncertainty with that of micro management. If you hand over all the monthly reports and ask the underling to "do the accounting" and then complain about the way he used excel you are a bastard and should stop. The mere fact that you have given the underling a task means he will try accomplish it in the best and timeliest fashion, i just found out timeliest is a word - hell yea English. Give them the room to discover how to do that and  intervene when their good intentions go awry.

Martin Principle: Basically everything that arised from original thought was seen as an unprovoked attack on his personality. After all he had been through, how dare I try a different method. This issue mainly concerned the use of technology. I as a new generation social media whore that was familiar with the positive attributes of a blog. As a result I started a class blog for the enjoyment of thirty people and would contribute a significant amount of time ensuring my class had constant updates and new material to view. Once discovering my blog he was incredibly disappointied because in a single post, out of the more than a hundred posted by then, I had told the class that I love them like my family. "How can you say you love people", he asked with horror on his face. I bit my tongue and told him I would not mention the college by name from then on. The blog went onto have more than a 1000 individual views a month but it was still a massive pain in his ass.

I always have time for Managerial venn diagrams, don't you?

R - Relatedness

As a manager it is your duty to remember important facts about people that work for you. Yes I know it is very annoying and you have ten trillion things to do but also you can understand how demotivating it is to arrive at work and put in a full day and then blow your birthday candle out by yourself. This is not some technique either it is frikken human decency. As a manager the advice is to at least have a conversation to try understand your staff. It isn't that difficult, next time Susie is late ask her why. Maybe she had to take two trains and leaves three hours before you do. It is all just a little understanding.

Martin Principle.
My best friend in the world studied with me at college. Half way through the first year she developed a chronic and life changing condition that forced her to change her entire lifestyle and endure surgery every few months. Martin did not hede any notice and took the fact that she was sick for so many days as a form of personal insult. While she was recovering from having a section of her intestine removed he was publicly contemplating why she did not have a "work ethic". What he did not understand was the damage he was doing to his own character. Everybody knew what was happeing to my friend and every time he complained about her absenteeism, my colleagues asked themselves if he would be disappointed if they died, because he would no longer have a full class.

F- Fairness 

In the broad spectrum of managerial life do you treat everybody equally or do you reserve your best for the people that look sort of like you? Do you have different punishments for different individuals based on their social  proximity to you? Let iit be known that everybody is counting straws and feels hard done by when you let one go and when to drown another. Fairness is equality.

MArtin Principle: I felt early on that he had taken a special interest in me simply because people kept being astonished by the amount of times I had been called into his office. The main issue was the absenteeism related to work. Their were members of my class that were working as well that I do no recall ever being reprimanded for missing class. I was reprimanded for going out to lunch instead of eating at the college. C'mon Mr Martin? I bid you a farewll and hope you never have a say in my personal life ever again. Au Revoir. :)

The top 5 ways to get fired as a Guest Service Agent

Buying guests drugs when they ask for them.

In the deep underworld of great service I always just assumed that drugs were something a hotel covertly acquired for high paying guests. Now bear with me, after the lengths I have seen the hotels go to, to keep guests happy, it is an easy assumption to make. Hence the most awkward conversation I have had with management so far. I spent the next few hours wracked with guilt that it might have been a secret shopper and my first review would contain the sentence, "Agent attempted to solicit cocaine but was unsuccessful." I later witnessed the guest drunkenly stroking the potted plant in the lobby and breathed a sigh of relief.  I won't go into further details except to say that hotels do not and cannot offer you drugs at the front desk.

Like this, only I am wearing a suit.

Walking in on a guest without knocking.

This seems extremely obvious and I can see you have raised one eyebrow in a condescending  manner but I digress. Part of my day is checking room discrepancies where the front desks status of the room differs from that of housekeeping. This means that you have to physically walk to each room and check if there is anybody currently occupying it. You alway start off with three good knocks and a pause but after 26 floors and forty rooms it is more of a slight tap and enter. If you add the fact that the last 13 rooms have all been empty and it feels like you are on a roll, you begin to take chances and just enter the room. This is how all the front office horror stories happen, from naked guests, love making guests, masturbating guests to guests drunkenly sobbing over their fast food. My only experience  so far went something like this. I opened the door and the room was pitch dark, I walked in and announced "guest service agent" in a hushed but confident shout. A woman rolled over in the bed and hissed "Shut up, I know its you and shower, you are drunk"   I left without saying a word and realized later that she had thought I was her husband.

"I am so sorry mam, I am just checking if you are enjoying your stay"

Giving a guest an upgrade because they are sexy.

I have indicated before that the person at the front desk has the power to give you an upgrade based on a whole vat full of trivial reasons. However those reasons have to align with a sales or business orientation of some magnitude when you later explain it to management. Especially if they now have to downgrade a VIP guest because all the suites have now been sold. Being the full blooded male that I am, I have had the opportunity and desire to upgrade a guest based solely on the stir that occurred inside of me while they were patiently waiting for their room keys. I have not done this however because my current management are actually quite equipped to do their jobs. The "I gave them an upgrade because it was their dog's birthday " will fall flat if my manager meets the guest at a later stage and they happen to still be so darn good looking.
.

Not checking if a visitor is on the reservation.

Guests are frequently upset by the hotels policy that, unless you are on the reservation, you may not get keys to a room and I can understand why. Most of the time a guest will just have forgotten to include his wife, or friends, name on the reservation. Sometimes the guest is unreachable and the wife or friend have no option but to sit in the lobby and wait. Waiting makes people angry. This rule is not for most people.

Stalkers or crazy ex-husbands don't come with a easily recognizable flag attached to their heads that makes filtering them out from the general population easy. They look just like you and me and to stop them from getting access to you and murdering you, we refuse to give them keys. One of my managers told me a story of when he was just starting out and still naive enough to be believe that all people sharing a last name are in a happy committed relationship. He gave, a warm friendly woman, a key to her husbands room. Little did he know that the gentleman was having an affair. The husband later sued the hotel for a breach of service, privacy is something most hotels promise, and won.

Occupied check-in. 

Every professional has a career ending mistake summed up in a phrase that is always at the back of your mind. For chefs it is "salmonella poisoning" and coincidentally for police officers and porn stars it is "accidental discharge." In the hotel world it is simply an "occupied check in." An occupied check in occurs when you check in two sets of guests into the same room. Everything that can happen to a Guest Service Agent when they walk in to a room unannounced, can now happen to a paying conservative family of four. You try explaining to the Jones's why they walked in on the Smiths on their wedding night. No amount of free breakfasts or pictures of puppies is going to remove the images they just witnessed from their minds. My biggest fear is I orchestrate an occupied check in to guests in one of the multi-roomed suites because not only are they the highest paying guests but with multiple rooms they could share the same suite for hours before realizing they are not alone.  

My 2 cents on religion.

Just saying. Also it really grates my carrot when I check priests into rooms that are being sold for a few hundred, sometimes thousands, bucks a night. How different do you think the world would be if churches were just inclusive community meetings and every hour of prayer was spent volunteering?  

The 5 things: Life have has taught me.

I haven't posted in a week which in internet time makes my last post a message from the dark ages with as much meaning as a Cosmo article from 2002. Seriously just stop reading that crap.

I will post, about the bars and museums I have been to lately, tomorrow. I admit that I lagged this week, returning to the familiar instead of pushing into the unknown. With 10 000 restaurants in NYC alone, it all feels like I am shining a torch into the grand canyon and explaining how beautiful the view is, but give me a break.

The top 5 things life has taught me. 

5. Be the best friend you can be.

Luckily High school was pretty awful for me. I am not being judgmental about the people who had it easy in high school at all. Who knows what shapes their lives and decisions? I certainly do not. I however did not have that many friends in high school. Sure, I was friendly with a lot of people, the same way I am friendly with the waiter at Mc Donald's or my accounting lecturer. A smile and small talk is not friendship, it's common courtesy. My friendships lacked depth and because of that I was able to see the people who were bargaining their time and the people who simply wanted to spend time with me.

Beyond that I learnt that forming judgments of people certainly gets you absolutely nowhere. I can imagine what kind of image you would form of me, if you only had my friends to base my existence on, but I can promise that I am not the person they would have you think I am.

The lesson to learn here is don't be friends with someone because of what they can offer you socially and don't not be friends with someone based on the voices around you. People are stupid, even when they mean well and are looking after your best interest, they are still stupid.

Be friends with the people who don't demand anything from you except time. The kind where you know it doesn't matter if you don't speak for a month because their kid will still punch your kid in the face at some point in time.

4. Don't listen to authority figures.

This and this and this. I have been dissapointed more times, by people who should no better, than I want to count. I had a psychologist tell me once that my view on life is far too positive to be natural and that I was being delusional. A few weeks later I moved to New York fulfilling a dream many had told me was out of my reach and simply impractical.

Firstly I think the misunderstanding is generational and I have spoke about this to a fair number of people who disagree with me but I am choosing to stick to my guns. As the forefront of the Google generation we often went to the internet for answers long before we asked authority figures about their ideas. Secondly what the internet had to say was often so different, I actually became defensive to old age advice. The way I see it: our parents and grand parents are the two generations that shaped the world between now and WW2 and now although we progressed monumentally, the progress has been misshapen and twisted, serving very specific ideoligies and beliefs. Thank you, but for the fist time in history we have an entire generation thinking globally instead of nationally, even racially, and it is our turn to run with the baton.

Lastly and controversially, it was not my generation that was running the show and voting in the elections that got us in to the current mess of global finance and politics and - sorry to say it- it will be us that gets us out of it .

"Be careful of whose advice you buy but be patient with those that supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of dishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it is worth" Baz Lurhman - Wear sunscreen


3. Make out with as many people as possible. 

Ha ha ha ha ha but yes. My meaning for this point is to have as much fum as you can without breaking your own moral code and being disgusting. We are so often told that pure enjoyment is useless and not worth it. It has gotten to the point where you need a reason to drink at a bar other than you are at a bar. Listen here world, I can still be the best employee, I can still jump onto the bar, take my shirt off and laugh so hard I tear the corners of my lips, on my day off. For fudge sake, we are men and women in every aspect of our lives lets behave like men and women when we are having fun.

2. Drinking makes things easier.

Tongue in cheek and business orientated. Being able to control your drink makes you a social genius. Business deals if conducted properly happen over a drink with a person who has no option but to now be your friend. Colleagues will appreciate you so much more if you got just as drunk as them at the Halloween function and were still the most entertaining. It is't about getting drunk, it is about getting appropriately dunk so that you can have fun and the people around you will feel comfortable. Say my friend has four beers, being completely sober and being completely smashed will have the same affect. Just meet them where it feels right and you will be fine. Nobody ever said social navigation was easy, people keep complaining how hard it is, learn this!

1. Work as hard as possible 

The rest is all semantics, the best and easiest honest way to move forward in the world is to be the hardest working individual you know. Sucks to be a woman, awesome to be a man, I know. In all truth it is the only way you want and should be recognized. I had a geography teacher tell me that I should work smart, not hard. Screw that, I will work smarter and harder than everybody else to ensure I have the future I envisage for myself and if I fall down I will pick myself up and make up for lost time.

The secret to working the hardest is easy. PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE and some more PRACTICE. More practice than anyone can believe! Managers will go to you first to solve problems and so will your colleagues. Ernie Ese said , "the harder I practice the luckier I get." There is no way around this little fact of life but it is the one that will get you furthest.

Updatichness

If anybody read my old blog compared to my new blog I am a lot more personally preserved. I have tried to keep my personal emotions out this blog as much as possible. It's not working so screw that idea.

A lot of people criticize my generation as the open diary children who prefer to have the lives critiqued by strangers than keep it to themselves but hells to the yea, I love the idea. We spent the last 170 000 years keeping stuff to ourselves, lets try something different.

The view of the new World Trade Financial Center from my street.

My physical state:

I have done better than I was expecting and have easily kept up to three meals a day but that is going to change over the foreseeable future, with reduced income because of my shift changes and the fact that I had to pay the security deposit on my room I have little money left. This is exciting because for the first time in my life I am actually concerned about getting enough food to carry on daily tasks. It is a challenge but one that I can easily overcome, between eating extra large at work and scoring a ration here and there from my roommates I will be fine. I have yet to sign up to a gym and will do so tomorrow as a result I haven't gained weight - I have lost it - but have lost definition and generally just feel like a lazy bum.

The view of the Brooklyn Bridge from my balcony.

My emotional state.


I've been extremely lucky to find such a great set of roommates. They have been supportive and allowed me to transition easily into my new transient lifestyle. I have also met some amazing people in my few adventures on the street especially Anne and Austin who made this weekend one of the best in my recent history. My fellows at work have been accepting and more than willing to help me, even going further than the eyes of the supervisors and moved me in the right direction. I have started feeling homesick. I miss the communication I had daily with my friends. I miss having somebody around all the time. My mother will tell you how my house was sometimes a terminal with people moving in and out but now I am completely alone. I miss having histories with people. I am the new guy to everybody and it is still early days but it is hard. But you know what

I FUCKING LOVE IT, everyday I am learning from the best in one of the best hotels in one of the best cities in the world and sucks to be sad but I am not.

WHOOP THE DOO, BRING IT WORLD.

Plan of Travel Attack: Week 1.

My third weekend just passed and I have been trying my best to do as much as possible but my wallet, beaten and broken, can't take it anymore. Looking at all the available options that I can abuse money on, I think I have done pretty well in the last few days. Packing in as much bang for my buck as possible. Also I have stopped converting everything into Rands and going "that's so cheap". This is an illusion, and it's not cheap and I should stop being retarded.

I started with the bars immediately in the vicinity around the apartment building. Along with Charlie, the landlord, who once was the second largest bar owner in New York City. I have been given access to individuals and respect at bars I do not deserve. It is a thrill though to walk into a bar with a man that receives his favorite drink before he has even sat down.

Ryan Maguires (Financial District)

The best thing about this bar is the authentic Irish staff. They could all be paid actors with shocking Irish accents but they seem legit. Every bartender I have met is Irish and even though it doesn't make the service- which is fantastic- or the drinks any better. It is FREAKING AWESOME. There is nothing quite like watching a tipsy American lose a wit war with an Irish bartender and not even realize it. Case in point: an older gentleman arguing about his bill was told "how can I believe a man with a combover, clearly you are lying to yourself, so what is stopping you from lying to me?" Silent giggles erupted all over the place. There are also a good bunch of regulars that make walking into the bar feel like you are returning someplace instead of visiting.


Liam's (Financial District)

This bar is slightly darker than the rest, with a pool table downstairs and excellent chili fries. I was recommended the chili fries by regular at another bar and ordered them and they were good - its not like I just praise just any food that has been put in my mouth. The bar has gone with the more traditional route of putting pretty ladies behind the bar and spoil me rotten loses geniuneship because of it. The beer flows easy and I can see myself having a great time here.

Open Door Gastropub. (Financial District)

This bar is really modern with a yuppie feel and would be great for a date night. Booths run the length of the long bar and the staff are professional and got to know my name even though I had only been there once before. Not because I was a crazy customer but because the service is great. I never ordered any food but gasto pub implies they serve it so there is that as well.

Julius Bar (Greenwich Village)

The oldest gay bar in NYC. A non imposing bar with a fair share of regulars and a bartender that is part of New York lore, it is definitely a bar worth visiting for a quick stop on a bar crawl. There is an open kitchen area across the bar where you can order traditional NY cuisine - burgers and hot dogs - for really reasonable prices.

The Stonewall Inn (Greenwich Village)

The bar where it all arguably began and home to the Stonewall Riots of the 70's, which set off the modern gay rights movement. I met Tree, a bartender who was on hand in 1969 during the riots and has worked there ever since - that is his name, if he picked it up on a long weekend I could not tell you - and he is an encyclopedia of New York history. I spent the afternoon just listening to his stories of old NY. I was really lucky and plan on having a few more long afternoons listening to this bartender share his thoughts and memories. The stonewall plays to an older generation now but because of its history is a meeting place for young people new to the city.

Marie's Crisis (Greenwich Village)

This was the most fun I have had in a very long time. The venue consists of an open area around a piano. The piano man plays requests or medleys and all the patrons just sing along. It is like group karaoke. Solo singers also take the chance of pleasing the crowd and I take my hat off to the men and women who can sing in front of a room packed with people on all levels of sobriety. The drinks are cheap and strong, STRONG, I watched with a slack jaw as the bartender filled my glass with two quarters Jack Daniels and a splash of coke after I had asked for a double.

Candle Bar (Upper West Side)

Maybe it is because I went there on a Sunday night but this place is a dive, doesn't mean I did not have fun. The patrons are extremely friendly and we got into some uproariuously funny conversations and a few hectic arguments with a variety of people. The clientele varied greatly from a 72 year old native american man to a recent Havard graduate. This bar felt like a place out of the tourist loop and I saw New York for New Yorkers the first time. The drawback was my bill tab had no relation to recent history and I will not be returning.

Snafu (Upper East side) 

I popped in here the first time making my way home. A literal hole in the wall with so much more to offer, it is a suit stronghold .Since I have been back twice with work colleagues and had a blast. The bar gets very busy into the evening and finding somewhere to converse is a problem but with $3 dollar beers and $5 dollar whiskey shots is fantastic because it is a stone's throw away from all the upper east side hotels and sights. Ten minutes from Time Square it is central and a great choice for a weekday get together.

Bodies - The Exhibition (Financial District) 

The exhibition is literally down the road from me and having seen it publicized in many forms - it was even featured on CSI: Las Vegas - I really wanted to go. Make sure you look for a coupon online because at $30 it is pricey. The exhibition is very well laid out and comes from a medical point of view exploring each of the body's philosophical mechanisms at a time. The actual bodies are a combination of grotesque reality and artistic beauty and you get more out of seeing the dead displayed this way than you learn about the reproductive system. There is a hushed respect within the exhibition and I would recommend to anybody that wants to explore the reality of death and doesn't work in the medical industry.

Advice for Front Office and Guests

Okay so I am fully aware that I haven't updated in a few days but I wanted to explore the financial district the most I could in a week before I updated. I am taking tomorrow to visit the museums on my list and then I'll be ready.

The past week has been my first full week of proper work where the focus has shifted from my training to whether or not I can actually do my job. Turns out I'm pretty good at it.

Tips for Front Office Employees.

1. Never say no! You don't have to and the guest does't have any reason to care that you should. If you ever get into a situation where a guest is requesting something you cannot provide leave the desk for a minute, especially if you are busy, and think about personalizing an individual response to the problem. Guests don't mind if their check in takes a few minutes longer but they do mind if they don't get what they asking for.

2. Never offer just one alternative. This works especially well if they are angry, returning to the front desk with multiple options gives the impressions that you actually pieced together their problem and its constraints, which you are forced to do if you keep this in mind. Options give the power back over to the guest and make them feel like they are controlling the situation.

3. Smile always. If a guest is angry before they even get to you, a MASSSIVE smile and genuine concern relax them instantly. Judge the situation carefully and try, being sensitive, to joke around. It doesn't matter how upset they are, if you can get them to smile or smirk - you just made your job so much easier for yourself.

4. Personalize and separate yourself from the organisation. This works in two ways. Firstly you do not become personally responsible for the situation and it reduces the risk that your name will end up in a complaint. Secondly it forms a personal understanding, where you as employee agree with them totally, even though "the organisation" does not. After you have separated yourself you can give them personal advice, in line with what the policy is anyway, and they are much more likely to accept it because you now have their best interest at heart.

5. Never be afraid to admit a mistake. Same as your parents, guests would much rather deal with a mistake as it happens than find out about it a few days later from somebody else. In my first few days escorting guests to their rooms I would get lost in the massive hotel. Making the guest understand that I am new and that I am trying my best makes the journey a small adventure instead of an inconvenience. Guest's love this! Honesty is a universal social lubricant: dishonesty is simply bad service.

6. Follow up. Some guests have personalities that you will automatically remember. some don't. It doesn't matter they all paying for the same service. Treat everybody with the same respect and reward great guests with extra special service but make sure you follow up. Just providing one extra teeny service, an ice bucket for example, will cement the process as positive and complaints will turn into praise.

7. No good deed goes unpunished. This is the hardest lesson I am learning and it has happened personally to me. For example, a guest arrives at 9am for a 3pm check in. They have had a long flight and are extremely upset that they have to wait for a room. You switch rooms around and get them into a vacant room without a wait. Smiles all around. Six hours later they are back at the desk requesting a room change because the room you put them into AT THEIR REQUEST does not have a view or is smaller than they were expecting. You cannot say it is actually their own fault so rather stick to policy and let them blame the industry standard than you or your hotel.

That done there are a few things guests repeatededly complain about that baffle me.

1. Check in times. Check in time is 3 o'clock universally. Just because you arrived at nine does not mean you automatically move in. The hotel I work at is frequently 100% occupied and guests do not check out before noon. I know you are tired but you arrived early We will get you into a room as soon as possible, sometimes within a few minutes but understand, it is similar to asking a doctor who opens at 9am to see you at 11pm and getting upset that he cannot.

2. The view. The hotel is slap bang in the middle of New York City, We are surrounded by high rise buildings. You do not come to NY for majestic views and we cannot offer them. You paid for a room on the 7th floor and want to the see the coast? I cannot do that, God himself cannot do that. Why you want a view on a normal city street is above my understanding. why you will get upset about it flabbergasts me.

3. The person serving you. This is a rule that applies generally to all situations in life. You have a problem and between you and the solution is a single person. DO NOT ATTACK them based on looks, observations or stereotypes. They will lose any interest in helping you and your chances of getting what you want plummet to just above mediocre. We are human beings and you would never speak to us this way if there wasn't a desk between us. Motivate me to help you and I will probably, more than you expected.

Tips and tricks for guests.

1. Everybody asks for an upgrade. Seriously everybody does and we have an obligation to fulfill those as best we can. Real world constraints are: time of day, availability and - no jokes- how pushy you are about it. Hotels offer you to request special rooms beforehand, make use of this. We will not re-assign a room if the guest made special requests at the time of the reservation unless we have too. The best upgrades get given first so check in early and ask and you will probably get what you want, arrive at 12pm when the hotel has had 96% check ins and you only get the option of whats left, it won't be much.

2. If you are celebrating let us know. This is hotel gold for free. If you let hotels know beforehand they WILL make special arrangements. If you let them know at check in they will do their best. If you let them know at check out, well sorry we cannot read minds and deal with it.

3. Always look for honour guests desks or specialized check in areas. The employees that work these areas are the most experienced and have the most power when it comes to upgrades etc. They will always receive any guests and you do not have to part of a program to use them.

4. I might get into trouble for this one but here goes. If you have a genuine complaint DO NOT immediately ask for a manager. The manager will deal with your problem as fast and professionally as possible but that doesn't not meant you will get the best option. Involving staff that were involved previously means they become liable for the complaint and they will work with you to resolve the issue. You increase your saying power significantly by cordially getting as many people involved as possible.

My Plan of Travel Attack

I have been struggling to figure out how exactly I am going to plan so that I will be able to make the most of my time in NY. So I've project managed it and broken it down into smaller digestible chunks. I will spend one week focused on each of Manhattan's neighbourhoods. I move into my new room in the Financial District tomorrow so I will explore that first. I think I am all excited and not so daunted no longer, captains.

I think I got this. Now for a cup of Joe.

Charlie Chaplin: Humanity

This Speech written by Charlie Chaplin for his film, released two weeks into World War 2, is still relevant. When will we learn, take a minute and listen, this gave me chills.

Coming to New York?

Good Morning my 30 regular readers and people who have arrived here by accident and are now slightly frustrated. I would like to extend an open invitation to help anybody coming to New York.  Coming over for a week, or a year, doesn't matter, us foreigners gotta stick together. So let me know and I will help you out as best I can. I will guide you around or find answers to your questions. Also if you plan on staying at the Waldorf=Astoria give me a shout and lets see what I can do for you.

Today is going to be an amazing day. Can just feel it in my bones. Maybe that means it's going to rain? I don't know it is very early.

Sail Re-edit. Hilariou-osity, humourtastic, so Haha-licious.

Another funny vid from the girls at Nanalew. See the rest of their videos here. As much fun watching two girls play with a hosepipe you will have all week.

Stare at the red dot and the blue circle will dissapear.

Honest truth, I'mma doing magic.

Pops-tickle Stick Bomb

HOW, HOW, HOW, HOW, HOW, does this work, awesome man, Where can I buy a pops-tickle.

The Royal Suite

Stumbled on another amazing suite. This is the royal suite and was residence of The Duke and Dutchess of Windsor. The room is immaculate, crystal and gold everywhere and all the furniture is either restored or original period antiques. 

The suite consists of two rooms, a living room, and dining room. The chandelier on the right is entirely made out of crystal with intricate blue roses.

There is more gold in the bathroom finishings than in most jewellry stores. HA HA HA I can dream!!!!

Staten Island.

I had to go to Staten Island to go view some apartments. The ferry is really easy to get to with three subway stations all stopping either right on top or basically right on top of the terminal. If you doing the tourist thing then this is a great idea for a Sunday morning. Battery Park is located right next door and is currently being used as an urban farm. There was also some kind of market going on. The park is also where you can catch a ferry to Ellis Island or the Statue of Liberty.

Tourist Tip: For the best view of Manhattan let everybody get on the ferry before you, the ferry heads straight out of the terminal and doesn't change direction. Simply step onto the loading ramp and turn around, you'll get an awesome view without frantically fighting for a seat on the upper decks.

It is so strange that so much happens on such a small piece of land. The new World Trade Centre buildings are the buildings with the cranes on top of them. Another place I would like to go see.

How to find an Apartment in NYC.

Apartment Hunting 101

I'm one week into my hunt for a room and no further to finding one. It seems counter intuitive that it would be so hard to find a good apartment when there are so many offers available on so many different websites. Finding one that is within my price range and reasonably close to work is tough.

Where I am looking:

Manhattan: The Island. Expect to pay for the convenience of living on the Island, with rooms starting at about $800 if you lucky and averaging at more than a grand unless you find a roommate who can split room costs, it is just impractical for students who are just settling in. There are better offers further between Harlem and the Bronx that have easy access to the Subway systems and are worth checking out. Also don't expect reasonably priced rooms to be furnished. A good resource to finding properties in Manhattan can be found at www.corcoran.com

Queens. To the west of Manhattan this Burrough is a great place to start. Fully serviced by subway it is within good travel times for Midtown. Astoria is about half an hour from Midtown by subway and seems to be the starting point for many immigrants I have met so far. I have heard quite a few people say Astoria is the new "up and comer" in the city and is very reasonably priced. Traditionally a Greek neighborhood the influx of students makes finding a room that is furnished easier than other places. Unfortunately most places I've looked at are snatched up before I even get a showing. This is still my first choice destination.

Jersey City. Twenty minutes from Times Square by bus with rooms going for as little as $500 this is also an area of great interest for me. I'm a bit scared of travelling to Jersey because I'm not exactly sure about the bus routes yet but I will find out in good time. Being out of New York also means the cost of living is less and if you can get a room close to the river you can get an awesome view of the city.

Staten Island: I'm not really sure what convinced me that this would be a good idea but against the warnings of everybody in the office I decided to see for myself. The prices are good starting at about $500, you can snatch a whole apartment for just less than a grand. The problem is the commute. The ferry leaves every half hour during peak times and takes half an hour to get across the channel. Add that service ends at 11:30PM and you won't be able to stay any later than that in Manhattan if you want to get home. Also imagining the ferry in New York winter seems insane but I take my hat off to all those that make the trip every day.

Brooklyn: I cant exactly tell you why but I tend to gloss over the ads for Brooklyn, it is probably totally uncalled for but I get a sense of weariness. I will have to start looking here and plan on spending my next weekend exploring Brooklyn so I can get over whatever this nonsense I have in my head behind me.

Resources 

Craigslist:

1. Make sure you have a working American number as many people do not respond to just emails.
2. Use the posting ID as the subject in your reply emails because when you get a reply you have no way of telling which advert the respond is referring too. Which becomes a problem when you have sent out 25-30 emails in one sitting.
3. I'm not sure but it seems that people don't remove their ads when they have filled the position so expect a lot of null and voids.

Padmapper.com

1. I really enjoy using this site and their slogan is "Making apartment hunting suck less." so at least they understand it sucks. This website is great because it pins all the adverts from craigslist, gumtree etc onto a Google map of your search area so you can see exactly where and how far the rooms are. They don't have a filter for holiday/short term rooms so expect to do some digging to find what you looking for.

Easyroommate.com

1. Another great resource with lots of ads, it allows you to email the advertiser without upgrading. It also notifies you if your email has been read so you know if you don't get a response to remove the room from your list which makes things more convenient. 

Nyhabitat.com

1. This is the only professional agency I am using and I am keeping them in my pocket as a last resort. Professional and quick they are just too pricey for me. They charge the first month's rent as the commission but a colleague of mine used their service and was very happy. 

General tips

1. Beware of sliding scale rent structures. The first 3 months rent will be $750 and then it will jump to say $1100 and if you signed a contract without realizing this you could be in some serious trouble. 
2. Try get a room with utilities included, this generally covers your water, heat, WiFi and cable. If utilities are shared you might find yourself paying utilities for the whole apartment if 3 roommates decide to move out at the same time. 
3. I only learnt this tip today from one of the hot kitchen chefs at the Waldorf. If using an agency ask if there are any "Fee Paid Apartments". This means the commission is paid by the landlord. I will try this tomorrow and let you know how it works out.
4. The NYC Affordable Housing Center has some great tips.

Occupy Wall Street

Follow the live feed here: http://www.livestream.com/globalrevolution

Like almost everybody in the city I heard the buzz about the group of protesters in the financial district during the week. Today I had time to go investigate after spending the morning in Staten Island apartment hunting. First I walked down Wall Street which was covered with NYPD and K9 units but could not find any activity other than tourists taking pictures. I remembered that they were in a park and turned around, walked down Broadway and came across the camp.

I spent about an hour walking around talking to other people, listening to the grand standing. The camp consists of a haphazard mix of furniture, tarps, plastic bags of belongings and what I assume to be tents packed away for the day. The media has been quick to point out that the effort is without focus and apparently leaderless. This is however a grass roots campaign that has just begun to stumble and walk.

The movement's website features a video found on http://wearethe99percent.tumblr.com/. Watch it, It explains in pretty plain terms why the protesters are angry.

This woman was standing at the entrance to Liberty Park, greeter to the masses and face of the cause I guess.  Message is pretty clear and reminds me of Animal Farm by George Orwell. 

The grand standers are not allowed to use megaphones, which for a country as free as the States seems a bit rough. Instead using short sentences everybody within earshot repeats the message to those behind them and so forth. It is quite haphazard and fizzles out often but they are adamant and make it work.

I had to giggle at this, Only in New York.

Protesters making posters to hand to the crowd. I ran out of battery almost as soon as I arrived so I couldn't take photo's of any of the signs but will get some snaps tomorrow.

I left at about 4 o'clock and I heard that people had begun to gather at Brooklyn Bridge Planning to cross it and move into Brooklyn Bridge Park. 400 protesters were subsequently arrested. Here is a vid I found of the actual arrests on the bridge.

I've also heard Veteran Marines are on the way to the Liberty Park to help protect the protesters from any further police intervention. I think the events on Brooklyn Bridge incident will have caused quite a stir and expect this to be a much bigger story tomorrow, I am going back to see what is going on and will post updates.